The unlucky name
by planet p
Summary: AU; a recounting of Lucy’s life.


Her name is Yang Ling, but she likes to call herself 'Lucy.' None of the other girls can say Yang Ling, at least, this is what they tell her.

Her father is Chinese and her mother is Japanese; it is worrying, sometimes. She speaks Chinese with fluency, not so much Japanese. She is born in the USA, so English is her native language.

When she is older, her mother's sister has a daughter. The daughter is named Midori. Lucy wonders if she will end up calling herself Mikki or Madison, when she is older. These are names the other girls will not pull faces at, will not complain about.

When Midori is nine, her mother dies. Lucy feels bad for her, her own mother still lives, and the girl is her cousin, not to mention that they are both only children.

But her father is not happy with Midori's father, he does not trust the man, so they do not socialise often.

Midori speaks Japanese, but learning to read and write it is going to take a bit longer.

When she is older, Lucy has a daughter. She names her Bobbi. It's a cute name, she thinks, and the other children will be able to pronounce it; it is a very common name. (Her father isn't happy with her choice of name; it is an unlucky name, he tells her. Her mother makes no comment; either to agree, or to disagree.)

By this time, Lucy knows why her father doesn't like Midori's father. He is with the Japanese mafia, the Yukuza. In fact, he is one of their leaders. Lucy doesn't let on that she is surprised, but she is.

When she goes to work for the Center, Midori joins her a few years later. It worries her, despite Midori's father's connections. The Center is a bad place, run by people who have made it that way.

When she is older, Lucy will go away; she will leave the Center to study in a university. She tells herself this as though it can comfort her. She hates how her boss, Mr. Lyle, calls her Yang Ling. She wants to slap him for it, but she's afraid he's a little crazy.

Crazy people, she is ill in her stomach from them. Why does she always meet them, at every turn? She can't answer her own question; it is frustrating.

Bobbi doesn't mind Lyle, it makes Lucy mad. She thinks he speaks better Chinese than she does, and better Japanese than Midori does; that makes her mad, too. He's supposed to be a lunatic, he's not supposed to be 'good' at things.

She doesn't know much about mad people, Midori tells her to go easy on them; real mental illness is not a joking matter. She only listens because it is Midori who tells her this. She's sick of Lyle always parking in places where parking isn't permitted. She swears it's like he's illiterate, but it's not as though he really can be. He's been to university, she's heard; he even worked in Canada, for one of the auxiliaries, and they _liked_ him!

She wonders what it would be like to travel around, to maybe see another country. She'd like to see China, or Japan; she's seen Switzerland on the television and she likes it, too. Bobbi would go nuts if she said they were going holidaying overseas; she'd be over the moon. But Bobbi's getting older now, she feels like she's slowly but surely slipping away from her. She's so independent; she's so set in her opinions, in her likes and dislikes; she knows what her abilities are, and she knows which areas she lacks in. She's such a grown-up child.

Lucy would be proud, if she wasn't always so sad.

Lyle has a sister, actually, they are supposed to be twins; her name is Miss Parker, she doesn't have another name, a first name. If she does, Lucy doesn't know it, and no one ever calls her by it. She doesn't like the look that comes onto Miss Parker's face whenever she sees her, it's like she's waiting for the axe to fall, and for Lucy to be gone tomorrow.

She doesn't even want to pretend to see the looks Miss Parker gives Lyle. They're supposed to be twins, which is cute; Lucy has always found it cute, but they're not cute. Miss Parker hates him, and he's always saying stupid things to her. Lucy wants to put a hand over his mouth until the stupid thought had gone away or died, but he's her boss, she's not his.

He's always winding her up, and every time he does, Lucy swears Miss Parker's looks get worse, _What, you're still here, are you?_

Lucy supposes he thinks it's funny or something, annoying his sister at every turn. She even shot him once, but that doesn't stop him, he always still opens his silly mouth. She feels like telling him that even her daughter is more mature than he is, but she won't bring her daughter into it like that; she remembers that he's mad, and that delicacy is required around people who have been so damaged that they can no longer be anything else.

She doesn't want Bobbi hurt because of her.

Apparently, she hears, he has children, too. She wouldn't have guessed it, he never acts it. He's supposed to have a son, who is officially his 'little brother,' and some other children, too. She knows about the little boy because Merchant is his carer, as well as Angelo's. Angelo is an Empath, and the little boy is, too; so the stories go. That is Merchant's thing.

The other children – there are three, of similar ages – live with their mother; she is one of Cox's nurses. Lucy doesn't really wonder about it; Cox and Lyle are supposed to be friends. She thinks Cox is about as creepy as Lyle, so it wouldn't be a surprise.

Miss Parker doesn't have children. Nobody really expects her to, either. Her mother is dead, her sister is dead, her fiancé is dead, her father is dead; she's not a happy person. Then she has Lyle to contend with; Lucy wouldn't be happy, either.

Miss Parker is supposed to bring Jarod back to the Center. He escaped in 1996, but he's still out there. Lucy wishes the Center would stop assigning Lyle to help Miss Parker find Jarod; every time they do, something invariably goes wrong. Like Jarod's brother, Kyle, who Lyle shot, or Jarod's sister, who he was told to kill, but even that he couldn't do right.

And that's not getting onto his homicidal reputation. (She supposes Jarod's sister was lucky, she wasn't his 'type.') Lucy gets Miss Parker's looks, now; his type is Asian girls, but he should know better, her cousin's father is Yukuza. She doesn't like that Bobbi trusts him, but there's nothing she can do short of revealing the truth to her: Your mommy works for a lunatic, yes. That'd go down a treat at the dinner table, she imagines.

She wonders what exactly he did in Canada, or what he studied at university. He does tell her that he studied computing, but that he had to leave before he'd finished his degree, so he had to complete it by correspondence. She asks about his impression of that; is university by correspondence easier than studying in person, or harder. He replies to tell her that it's different for everyone, and it _was_ a long time ago.

She says nothing, just nods. She's annoyed.

Even if she doesn't get to university, she decides that Bobbi will. Bobbi tells her that she's not interested in university, she wants to learn a trade. Lucy tells Lyle and he tells her that it's the kid's life. She wants to slap him; he can take it so lightly, but, then, he's never had anything to do with his kids' lives, has he?

She asks where he grew up. In the country, he tells her, it could actually rain quite a lot. She grew up in the city; she would have liked Bobbi to have grown up in the country.

People are always complaining that there is a job shortage, he replies, with a frown. She hates that, too.

She asks him about his wife; what was her name?

Lin, he says. He doesn't say anymore.

She heard that he killed his wife; she wonders if it was because he was mad, even then.

You'd be surprised, he tells her, and her heart stops for a beat. She hadn't said anything. She is alarmed.

He looks at her and sees her expression. It's a thing that happens with crazy people sometimes, he says, they hear things.

Other people's things? she asks.

Why not other people's things? is his reply.

Lucy isn't convinced that it works that way.

If you don't mind my saying so, he replies, but it _was_ pretty obvious by the look on your face what you were thinking. People tend to think a lot of the same where I am concerned; hardy anything new. It's quite boring, actually.

She doesn't know whether to pull a face, or what to do. Is he having her on?

When do you think this rain is going to let up? he asks.

She watches the rain outside the windows of the airport lounge. It's heavy and the clouds are still dark through the crashing raindrops.

Miss Parker appears, looking irate. Airplanes can fly in rainy weather, so why can't they take off in it?

Sydney brings her a coffee. Lucy looks at it and wishes he'd brought her one, too; she's not sure Miss Parker should be having coffee, it's not the best remedy for frayed nerves.

She looks around to where Lyle is sitting – Broots never talks to her, she doesn't know why – but Lyle isn't sitting there any longer. She sighs lightly, she hopes he's not getting himself into trouble, she's not in the mood for a confrontation with the airport security.

He returns with a coffee which he hands to her, and starts to relay what he'd been told by one of the airport staff about the rain.

She sips her coffee and listens, feeling her spirits sink. They're not getting out of here for some time. She always hates when they're holed up somewhere. She thinks about Bobbi; is it raining in Blue Cove? she wonders. But it's not likely. She remembers sunshine, as she'd left. She remembers Bobbi waving her goodbye from the gate of her high school.

Lyle has stopped talking. She struggles to recall the last thing he'd said, but it seems as though he'd just stopped in the middle of a sentence. She looks at him; the coffee cup is hot in her hand.

He's staring at something in front of him, at the window, maybe, and the rainy surface reflects in his eyes.

She tilts her head; he puts out a hand to right her coffee cup without looking at it; he's still staring out the window, or at the window.

I'm sorry, he says, I'm so sorry; but he doesn't sound sorry. He doesn't sound anything.

He looks at her and tucks a bit of hair behind her ear with a hand.

She sees Bobbi; she's with her school group, she has an excursion, today. It's so sunny, on the street; she's crossing the road with the other students in her class.

Lucy pushes Lyle's hand away, her eyes wide in horror. She shakes her head and realises he'd spoken to her in Chinese.

Her eyes feel watery. No, she says.

He blinks, and looks at his sister. She is sitting some way away, talking with Sydney. I'm sorry, he repeats, as blankly as before.

Her fingers lose their grip on the coffee cup and it slips from her hand to the floor; he doesn't even try to stop it.

He's staring at her, then, and she's staring at him, too. She can't look away.

* * *

**The unlucky name** by planet p

**Disclaimer** I don't own _the Pretender_ or any of its characters.


End file.
